17 Reasons Not to Move to Thornville, Ohio (Voted by the locals!)


I grew up in Thornville, Ohio and one thing I looked forward to doing while growing up was moving out of Thornville, Ohio. The rural farming area isn´t for everyone, but one thing I can say about Thornville, it has something for everyone to hate on.

Read on to hear about the 17 Worst things about Thornville Ohio to help you make your decision on whether Thornville is the right fit for you.

17. No Cultural Places

In Thornville, Ohio there are no places where a person could go to improve themselves. The closest library is fifteen minutes away and even at that, it is a very small library with hardly any visitors.

You definitely will not find any good concerts or theatrical shows in Thornville, Ohio. There is only one amphitheater within its city confines and the only band of worth that comes to it is Excision and their Lost Lands tour.

16. Curvey Roads

Do you get car sick while driving? If so you do not want to move to Thornville, Ohio. The entire city is made of backcountry roads that have never heard of the concept of straight.

The straightest road is US 40, but that road is made up of so many hills and is under cared for so that it is bound to wreak chaos on your car.

15. Bad Barnyard Smells

Black and white Holstein Friesian cows grazing on farmland.

Thornville, Ohio is a farming area. Wherever you are you are going to smell the lovely stench of cow pie.

There have been many times I have gone to Kroger’s and the smell of manure fills the air from farmers fertilizing their fields – not the smell you like when you are shopping for food.

Jennifer Grammer (a local)

14. Bad School District

Thornville, Ohio is not known for its school district. Its school district is the home of Lakewood Lancers. The school is staffed by teachers heading to retirement. These teachers have no more passion for the work and therefore are just trying to get through the lessons.

There are also major money issues within the school district and disrepair of the school buildings. The Elementary School is suffering from a lack of central air conditioning, which means your child in their intent to obtain an education and grow is more likely to have issues from heat exhaustion.

13. Roadwork Ahead

road work ahead construction sign in a residential neighborhood

I learned to drive in Thornville, Ohio and I can now drive anywhere because of its road issues. The potholes are insane and the roads are corroding away, because of how old they are.

Even though the roads are in disarray that does not mean it is from lack of maintenance. With all these heavy road decay issues there are always workmen trying to save what little of the road is holding together.

This also leads to issues of no other improvement for the area, because the entire city budget is going on road repair.

12. The Humidity is Horrible

In Thornville, Ohio during the summer there is no need to go to a swimming pool merely step outside and you will be swimming in so much humidity that your clothes will immediately stick to your body.

Humidity is a real issue in Thornville, Ohio, because not only is it uncomfortable, but it also leads to the molding of buildings. Therefore, buildings regularly need to be checked for mold build-up.

Also, for people like me with curly hair, it is very difficult to manage the amount of volume that the weather brings. You will become very familiar with the concept of hair cream.

11. The Post Office Parking is too Small

The local post office has a parking lot that was built for Thumbelina. In reality, there are three spots in the gravel parking lot.

The lot is also very small and once you are in the parking lot you are in one of the parking spots. This means the only way to get out of the parking lot is to back onto the road.

The road happens to be US 40, which is the cross-country highway. This is a hassle and dangerous for locals to have to deal with the out-of-state traffic while trying to leave their local post office.

10. Crazy Shows

Once a year the band Excision comes through for their music festival Lost Lands. This sounds like a lot of fun, and the actual concert for sure is great. The issue is that this is a week-long music festival that plays through the night. It is known for its large lights that can be seen several towns over and the music can be heard miles away from the actual arena.

The area in which the concert happens is really not meant for large performances and the locals are always kept up during these excursions. It also brings in a lot of traffic from other towns that the small town roads are not meant to occupy and this brings in hours of worth of traffic.

9. Storms

Supercell storm clouds with intense rain, Lithuania

Thornville, Ohio is in a very stormy central area. Every spring, summer, and fall it is expected to get several heavy wind and thunderstorms. Thornville, Ohio also gets a lot of tornados every year.

Yet, in Thornville, Ohio because of the large spaces of land with farming land, there are no tornado sirens. Therefore, you will need to become adept at recognizing the signs of tornado landings and keep connected to your local weather station on days that all the signs of bad weather are linking up.

8. School Board

As mentioned before, the school system in Thornville, Ohio is not well. The main reason for this is because of the issues with the school board. It is a very selective group of people with very little money management skills.

In Ohio, people pay school taxes based on what school district they are in and what amount of money the locals vote on paying to support the system. This does equal out to the rich housing areas have better-funded school districts and the poorer areas have less funded school districts.

While there is poverty in Thornville, Ohio another reason why no one wants to help financially support the school district is that the last time they paid the school money for maintenance they spent the budget to build a $1,000,000 football field. Football does bring scholarships, but unfortunately, our football team is not good and no one on our football team will ever get a scholarship for their playing skills.

The school board is staffed with parents with children in the football sport and they used their own personal motive of hopefully getting their child more attention in the field to forget the maintenance needs of air conditioning in the elementary school, fixing the broken pannels in the high school, and financially supporting the teachers.

7. Heavy Tractor Traffic

tractor on the country road

Thornville, Ohio is farmland and when there are farmlands there is a lot of tractor traffic. The fun aspect of tractor traffic is that, unlike rush time traffic, it is unpredictable in time.

Potentially you are heading to an appointment at 11:00 in the morning. You leave on time and then boom you are stuck behind a tractor going 15 in a 50 for the next 4 miles. This happens all the time and it is unpredictable.

6. Bad Local Football Team

If your child is interested in athletics do not bring them to Thornville, Ohio. Its sports program is not as good as it seems despite the $1,000,000 football field. The teams have not made it to state in years.

The sports coaches also have a history of inappropriate conduct. In 2017 a middle school coach was arrested for giving alcohol to middle schoolers before assaulting them. Therefore the screening process of the school coaches was not up to par.

5. Roads are Barely Plowed

It snowed last night. It is okay, because you do not have work today, but tomorrow. It is not going to get warm enough to melt the snow, but there are plows that plow the roads right. No, no there is not. At least not frequently. You are going to have to drive over the day-old compacted snow and deal with all of the fishtails your car will do.

This is another reason why I am an excellent driver. I remember many times just spinning in my car because I had hit a patch of black ice. It does make for more interesting travel, but also for more danger.

4. Can not Get Anywhere Without a Car

Aerial view of the road in mountain valley at sunset in spring in Dolomites, Italy. Top view of cars on asphalt roadway, house, railroad, hills with green meadows, blue sky, trees, buildings. Highway

There really is nothing in Thornville, Ohio. Thornville, Ohio is farmland. There are a lot of fields of corn and livestock, but there really is nothing else. This means you are going to have to use your car to get everywhere. The closest grocery store from my childhood home was twenty minutes away.

All that is in Thornville, Ohio is a hardware store, a gas station, and a bar. This leads to long trips to go anywhere of necessity or of interest.

3. Hospital is Far Away

As mentioned above there really is nothing in Thornville, Ohio. The closest hospital is 20 minutes away. If you have a medical emergency you need to hope that you can wait at least 20 minutes to receive care.

Ambulances can only travel so fast, and then they have to pick you up and then bring you back to the hospital. This means overall it will take 40 minutes to get to the nearest hospital by ambulance. This wastes extra time that could be used to help you receive the care you need.

2. Police take a Long Time to Respond

One of the core memories I had was when my little sister called 911. She was taught earlier that day that if there was ever an emergency she should call 911 and when she was left alone with our landline, (yes I am old), she decided that it was an emergency and dialed 911 and told the cops that she needed them right away. We did not realize this exchange happened until 1 hour later when a cop came knocking on our door asking about a 911 call.

My mother was embarrassed, but also a little scared about the reaction time of the call. She was able to track when the call was made and noticed how long it took for them to get here. We tried to comfort ourselves with the thought that most likely that they did not believe it was an emergency since it was a child over the phone. That thought changed a few years later.

A few years later when that same sister got older she decided to go hiking in our woods. She ended up getting lost and came out a few miles away at another home. It was actually a rental home and the people who lived there were not from town. When they saw my 12-year-old baby sister in their backyard confused and a little scared they called the cops.

They said they believed it was child negligence and potential abuse since my sister always walked with bruises and scrapes on her from her most recent adventure. The cops apparently took 45 minutes to get to that home to pick up my sister for social services to figure out that my sister told my mom that she was playing in the treehouse and my mom had already called in a missing person report.

Cops have a low response time in Thornville, Ohio so hopefully, you will never find yourself in need of one.

1. Good Doctors are over an Hour Away

Medicine doctor and stethoscope using tablet with icon medical network connection on virtual screen interface in hospital background. Modern medical technology concept.

The closest hospital is twenty minutes away, but it is mainly emergency care. There are no specialists for serious conditions except in the closest big city, which is Columbus, Ohio, which is an hour away.

My family has had a lot of medical emergencies and I remember having to make so many long trips to and from the hospital in Columbus to visit my family members who were receiving care there.

It is a rather inconvenient situation to not be able to spend as much time with your suffering family because the place where they would receive good care was so far away.

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